Warcraft Valley
Episode 15 - The Bachelor: X-Men Edition!

Episode 15 - The Bachelor: X-Men Edition!

June 3, 2020

Up top, Ryan and Katie want to encourage their listeners to donate to bail funds and other methods of supporting the protests against racist police brutality (blacklivesmatters.carrd.co) and also to remind any listeners participating in these protests of their rights (www.aclu.org/know-your-rights/protesters-rights).

Now let's talk about this goofy episode: This part of the fanfiction was written directly after Ryan and Katie graduated High School. All of the stress and angst that came with moving on from High School dissolves into the start of an epic summer of parties. This is the summer that eventually led to Ryan coming out of the closet as gay within the same year. As part of that self-discovery, Poochy makes his way through almost every male member of the X-Men, all while listing off who is dating who. The "Great War" that has been happening in the background of the past couple of years comes to a close, and not a single moment of it is described except for which characters went missing during the war we wouldn't have to write them anymore. We also had wanted to wrap things off before Katie moved, and then went off to college. Also: Gambit is injured by getting a sunburn.

Want to tell us about your embarrassing teenage fanfics? E-Mail us at warcraftvalley@gmail.com

Episode 14 - Poochy’s Gay, and so are all of the X-Men!

Episode 14 - Poochy’s Gay, and so are all of the X-Men!

April 23, 2020

Ryan slowly made his way out of the closet in High School to his friends and family, but his role play character full-on came out to do what he couldn't do in real life. Poochy immediately sleeps with all of the male X-Men, Vash and Wolfwood, and Brooklyn from Gargoyles. Meanwhile, Gambit also decides to start banging Wolverine, and Cyclops is also boning dudes. Suddenly! Everyone is gay. There are a few X-Men political points sewn into the plot, also Jill Valentine is there because why not, but let's be real: This chapter is literally porn. Everyone is having sex, and none of it is correct because it was written when we were horny teenagers and clearly had no sexual experience. It's actually hilarious to look back on and laugh at how naive we were about sex. This may be the most on brand episode of Warcraft Valley yet!

Want to tell us about your embarrassing teenage fanfics? E-Mail us at warcraftvalley@gmail.com

Episode 13 - Angsty X-Men vs. Sexy Sinister

Episode 13 - Angsty X-Men vs. Sexy Sinister

February 24, 2020

Teenage angst comes in many forms. In this case, it comes through the X-Men bickering with each other on DeadJournal, written by teenage Ryan and Katie who were freaking out halfway through their senior year of High School. Poochy gets "possessed" by a demon, mostly to excuse Ryan's erratic angsty behavior. Don't worry, though -- It's resolved when Stitch (Yes, the same one from Lilo & Stitch) uses his powers to remove the demon from Poochy's body (This really happens in here). All of the X-Men are fighting with each other over stuff that makes no sense, but really it was just Ryan and Katie having an angsty teenage argument through the characters they were roleplaying. And Mr. Sinister keeps showing up to do something ridiculously sexual. Just wait until you hear about when he was a hologram... And we laugh the whole through. This is peak bad fanfiction writing, folks, and we own it!

Want to tell us about your embarrassing teenage fanfics? E-Mail us at warcraftvalley@gmail.com

Episode 12 - The Legend of Poochy Chainlink and the 9 Sacrad Crystals

Episode 12 - The Legend of Poochy Chainlink and the 9 Sacrad Crystals

January 14, 2020

After all of the goth demonic angsty start of our teens, the fanfictions take a break from the typical sexy X-Men stories so Poochy and Nekawa can go be in Zelda: Ocarina of Time. Except we're not calling it that. Instead it's "Gifio7" and "The Sacrad Crystals", but all of the sages and even the talking Deku Tree are there, so it's blatantly Legend of Zelda. Mr. Sinister still is up to his tricks, and up inside Poochy -- Literally. It's weird. And Poochy is "possessed" during it.

Speaking of possessions, the Dark Phoenix has returned and is taking over peoples bodies casually in the background. Don't worry, it goes unresolved, because a giant war breaks out when all of the Trigun characters show up and the X-Men have to help the Warcrafts battle a version of Vash who is also possessed. Also Jan is also possessed, and so is Nekawa. Everyone is possessed! Even Jean-Luc, who is possessed and also a shapeshifter.

Oh, and jellyfish gets wrapped around Gambit's thing-a-ling, because this IS a Warcraft Valley fanfiction.

Episode 11 - Welcome to DeadJournal

Episode 11 - Welcome to DeadJournal

March 5, 2019

 

We have finally reached a new era of our fanfiction universe -- DeadJournal -- Because we were TOO GOTH for LiveJournal.

This was the start of our unhinged teenage years, and it reflects by the time we get to entry #2. Blood is everywhere, body parts are flying all over the place, people are getting possessed by psychics and demons, every adult is acting like a snotty teenager, Gambit and Archangel keep getting kidnapped, everyone is a swordsman, Jan's heart is breaking, and Poochy has developed approximately 9 different powers and may be a sailor scout retreating to a secret Renaissance planet that is literally the Legend of Zelda.

Also the cast of Trigun has been randomly placed into the team of X-Men, and it's not even explained where they came from or why they are there.

At least we have a newcomer writer and character to the series, Nekawa, a rogue Thundercat shapeshifter who has amnesia and is working for Mr. Sinister. She may be good or evil but NO ONE KNOWS.

Want to tell us about your embarrassing teenage fanfics? E-Mail us at warcraftvalley@gmail.com

Episode 10 - Gambit the Red-Eyed Mutant

Episode 10 - Gambit the Red-Eyed Mutant

December 18, 2018

Celebrate the holiday season with this special parody of "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" featuring Gambit and the cast of the X-Men and Thundercats in this bizarre, but very amusing cross-over!

We jumped ahead in time and read this fanfiction Ryan wrote from a much later year, so the writing is actually pretty decent in this one, and pokes fun at our own fanfiction. Enjoy!

Want to tell us about your embarrassing teenage fanfics? E-Mail us at warcraftvalley@gmail.com

Episode 9 - Poochy’s Prologue

Episode 9 - Poochy’s Prologue

November 15, 2018

Remember how Ryan was supposed to write his side of the Warcraft Valley stories? Apparently he did it in "Poochy's Prologue" which re-capped everything about their fanfictions, and then went on to explain that Poochy was also a master thief and sorcerer who lived on another medieval planet where his parents were dead and he gained the powers to control water, became a spy, and then became a member of the X-Men.

And then we slide right into a Christmas special, just in time for the holiday season!

Want to tell us about your embarrassing teenage fanfics? E-Mail us at warcraftvalley@gmail.com

Episode 8 - Thanksgiving with the X-Men

Episode 8 - Thanksgiving with the X-Men

September 27, 2018

What could go wrong when the X-Men invite Mystique and Sabretooth over for Thanksgiving?

Katie and Ryan pick up the next chapter of their teenage fanfiction universe roleplay, and read about when the X-Men have the most disfunctional Thanksgiving possible. Kitty and Kurt get married and have a baby. Mr. Sinister is secretly everyone again. Wolverine does drag. Gambit gets scratched.

Want to tell us about your embarrassing teenage fanfics? E-Mail us at warcraftvalley@gmail.com

 
Episode 7 - There’s a Sentinel in my House!

Episode 7 - There’s a Sentinel in my House!

August 23, 2018

It's been a while since our last episode. We took a bit of an unexpected summer break, but we are BACK with a brand new episode!

Picking up where we left off, Gambit has moved into the magical fanfiction world of Warcraft Valley where he hangs out with Katie's self-insert character, Jan. Gambit is in for a rough one though, as he is about to become the center target of every villain in the world. Not only does Mr. Sinister want him (In more ways than one), but the Friends of Humanity are keen on tracking him down. They've even gotten a Sentinel (somehow) that keeps attacking Warcraft Valley, which nobody seems to think is an emergency as everyone keeps stopping to make phone calls as the Sentinel destroys the whole house. Even Cyclops is out to get Gambit, and locks him in the basement.

Other weird shit happens too: Wolverine and Rogue get married, but Gambit is mad about it because he is having an affair with the BOTH of them. Gambit's Dad is both possessed by a mechanical spider and is also Mr. Sinister. Gambit gets the power to shapeshift into a plethora of animals. Mr. Sinister invents mechanical spiders which sneak into Gambit and then burst randomly out of his body. The X-Men keep flying a kite. Oh, and Gambit has to make the choice between saving someone's life or his teddy bear. It's quality stuff, folks!

Want to tell us about your embarrassing teenage fanfics? E-Mail us at warcraftvalley@gmail.com!

Episode 6 - When Untouched Love is Touched

Episode 6 - When Untouched Love is Touched

June 4, 2018

The title is poetic, isn't it? Don't worry. It doesn't last long.

Ryan and Katie dive further into their fanfiction universe rabbit hole, but this time they get to read one of Ryan's stories -- A special diary where Ryan's self-insert character shares his thoughts and feelings with the X-Men. Or at least that's what it's SUPPOSED to be. Instead, every entry revolves around what Wolverine isn't wearing, but Poochy "definitely isn't gay." Hey, Ryan was figuring some things out then. Eventually, things go south when everyone is vexxing for Logan's attention. You can definitely tell this story was written by a teenage Ryan.

Want to tell us about your embarrassing teenage fanfics? E-Mail us at warcraftvalley@gmail.com!